Five rules to guide you in life:
1. Forgive your enemies, but remember the bastard's name.
2. Money can not buy you happiness, but its more comfortable to cry in a mercedes than on a bicycle.
3. Help someone when they are in trouble and they will remember you when they are in trouble again.
4. many people are alive only because its illegal to shoot them.
5. alcohol does not solve any problems, but then again, neither does milk.
These should assist you with most daily decisions